spelling grief or this is the oldest i have been today (for my son)

i have stopped saying grief
stopped quoting myself
pretending suffering needs
company

because some times
rains come long before
umbrellas know how
to keep dodging raindrops
from becoming thoughts

and—so—the rains
like that word
i no longer pronounce
soak my days

drench my nights
until i survive—barely
by drowning

© 9/25/08